"I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers," we say.
But what are we really saying? Is that expression meant to be an authentic pledge or simply a meaningless platitude? Does a fearful, anxious, or even grief-filled person really gain anything from this promise?
Lately, in the wake of recent mass shootings, the offer of "thoughts and prayers" has been met with anger, frustration, mockery, and outright rejection. "I don't want your thoughts and prayers!" has been shouted back by some. Because, these days, the offer of "thoughts and prayers" is considered by some as simply code word for inaction or entrenchment.
When tragedy occurs, it is in our nature to want to understand why. We don't like the unexplained. We don't function well with uncertainty. We seek motive and answers. (We actually prefer control.) Why do bad things happen? When the answers don't come, we begin to fill in the blanks ourselves. No matter whether it is tragedy caused by another human, unexplained tragedies, or natural disasters, we demand answers and action.
We inhabit a massive, intricate planet that is constantly in activity and motion. Wind and water, tides and precipitation, temperatures and pressure are in a perpetual dance that, at its best, provides for breathtaking beauty and the sustainment of life; and, at its worst, gives us tornadoes, cyclones, hurricanes, earthquakes, volcanic eruptions, floods, tsunamis, droughts, heat waves, ice ages.... destruction and death. Human knowledge has made incredible advances in our understanding and ability to predict... some things. But, we cannot make these cataclysmic events cease to occur. No more than we can stop the earth from rotating and revolving. So, we prepare as best we can. And when tragedy does strike, we can and should work to help those affected.
When a loved one dies... by war, by disease, by suicide, by accident, by murder, or for reasons we don't even know... it is heart-wrenching. Humans fiercely cling to life and, when death occurs... when it is premature or unexpected, we want to know and understand why. We want rules changed, or laws passed, or medical procedures allowed.... just do something! Finding ways to prevent tragedy is prudent. We can discuss and debate how to solve these things without demonizing one another. Two truths are inarguable... nature is fierce and powerful... and humans can and do unspeakable evils to one another. It has always been.
I am not immune from the realities of life and the tragedies that can and do occur. But, as a Christian, I am not called to do nothing. When you face hardship and even death, I am called to walk with you through that time...to grieve and mourn with you. In times of trouble, you are to be in the forefront of my mind as I go about my day... setting aside my own priorities, if even for a few moments or hours, and to place what you are going through before my own immediate concerns. Keeping you in my thoughts. Assuring you that whatever you are going through... you have someone else that is trying to understand and be connected.
To say that I know exactly how prayer works would be grossly inaccurate. But, my faith tells me that I am to pray. The God of the universe... the Creator of all things tells me that His desire is for me (and all of us) to be in communion with Him through prayer. One of the things I am to do is ask... ask for my needs, ask for the outcomes I desire, and ask on behalf of someone else's needs. When I say that "I am keeping you in my prayers," I am interceding on your behalf with my Heavenly Father asking for His help to see you through your situation... as only He can do.
I can understand your pain as I have experienced my own. While we seek answers and solutions, please do not reject my offer to "keep you in my thoughts and prayers." That, and a warm embrace, when possible, is the highest gift I know to give you. I don't have the solutions to all the tragedies of life. But I know a Savior that does. And He has called me to walk with you and pray for you.
