Hang On, That's My Bad Side

 

Mr. DeMille, I'm ready for my close-up

I was reading an article today about a well-known TV personality wherein said personality disclosed the use of Botox (and multiple plastic surgeries) to try to maintain a more youthful look. The personality mentioned a bad Botox experience one time that had not only affected this person’s “bad side” but also caused a problem on the “good side.”

When we hear those two terms, we usually think about a person’s facial profile… as in “the right side of my profile is my good side.”

Good side, bad side.

(First off, when talking appearance, maybe a more positive viewpoint would be “good side/ better side?”) But I digress.

The article’s reference to good side/ bad side got me thinking beyond facial profiles.

Do all of us have a good side and a bad side?

How about with our demeanor?

What about the way we treat people?

How about how we handle conflict?

How about the way we live our life?

How about our business/work side versus our home/ personal side?

Are there two persons living inside each of us?

We all have seen people, when having their picture taken, turn a certain way relative to the camera or phone so as to show what they perceive to be their “good side.”

But don’t we also do the same thing with other aspects of our life?

Don’t we try to hide our “bad side?”

A favorite Christian songwriter of mine from back in the day is Bruce Carroll. In the 90s he recorded a song called “Shadow and Light.”

One of the verses says this:

” I am wise, I am a fool

A servant with a yen to rule

Good intentions and selfish schemes

A saint who soars on broken wings

Noble visions and narrow eyes

Contradictions side by side

Ogres and angels share my heart

Sometimes the battle tears me apart.”

We’ve all been there. Or are there.

Good side/ bad side. A life of shadow and light.

Depending on the width of this good side/bad side spectrum, our ability to cope, justify, explain, sleep at night, maintain relationships… greatly varies.

We can become overly fixated on our bad side. We can feel guilty, embarrassed, ashamed, and unworthy. We may feel like a fraud. Guess what? On some level, this is all of us.

To be sure, there may be aspects of our life and behavior that need serious examination and change.

While we should not fixate solely on our bad side, neither should we rest on our good side laurels.

We are obligated to acknowledge our human imperfection and strive to do better each day. Some of this might require some third-party help.

Bruce’s song goes on to say this:

“I am shadow, I am light

I am wrong and I am right

Sometimes shining oh so bright

Sometimes fading into night

Though You see this war in me

You know all that I can be

I am precious in Your sight

You walk with me through shadow and light.”

The “You” that Bruce references is the God Who created us and understands just who and where we are.

And He loves us despite ourselves.

Maybe some one-on-One conversation with Him about what you see as your good and bad side can help.

It has helped me.

“Shadow and Light” by Bruce Carroll

Songwriter(s): Paula Carpenter, Mark Comden, Geoff Thurman

Record Label: ©1995 Word Entertainment LLC, A Warner Curb Company

Adventures with HaRVy- Dump Your Tanks!

We experienced our first long-distance, extended-stay trip in our motorhome. HaRVy is our 2008 38ft Damon Challenger Class A. HaRVy pulls Dolly and Dolly carries Taurus (the Bull) so that we have transportation at our destination.

She must trust the driver- she's napping

Last week, we drove 420 miles up to Georgia and camped for 8 nights at Mistletoe State Park in Appling, GA on Clarks Hill Reservoir. The 71,100 acre lake was formed in 1954 when the dam on the Savannah River, now named for J. Strom Thurmond, was completed.

Back in our tent and pop-up camping days, we stayed at a couple of the nearby Corp of Engineer campgrounds-- Petersburg and Winfield but, I wanted to try the state park this time. We reserved a pull-through site which turned out to be an excellent choice. We have a 50 amp motorhome but, we were unable to get into one of the relatively few sites that have 50 amp service. That simply means that, with only 30 amp service, we would be unable to run both AC units at the same time. Fortunately, our AC is a ducted system which means that cold air comes out all of the vents even when only one unit is running. We also had water hook up but not sewer hook up (if we had a sewer hook up, it would be considered a "full hookup site.") By not having it, we would have to visit the nearby dump station when exiting the campground.

If you are familiar with bigger RVs, you are familiar with the terms "fresh water, gray water, and black water." This refers to the onboard holding tanks. We can carry 65 gallons of fresh water. This is water that is provided to the sinks, the shower, and the toilet (for flushing.) We also can hold 47 gallons of gray water. This is the water that goes down your sinks and shower drains. We also can hold 47 gallons of black water. This is the result of what goes down the toilet. Because we were hooked up to the campground's water supply (a drinking water hose connects to the motorhome essentially like your garden hose,) fresh water tank capacity was a non-issue since we had an endless supply of pressurized water. However, when camping for an extended period, you have to remain mindful and periodically check your gray water and black water tank levels. We have an electronic display on the hallway wall where we can check our levels. At some point, hopefully not before you are ready to leave, you need to dump your tanks. Judicious use of water down the sinks and shower is important since we don't have unlimited tank capacity. We take "Navy showers" (turn on the shower, get wet, turn off the water, soap up and shampoo, turn water back on, and rinse.) 47 gallons sounds like a lot but, over the course of 8 days, it accumulates fast. Using the campground's bath house for showering helps to not fill up your gray tank prematurely.


I'll save for a later blog the actual process at the dump station. I'm sure you will be on the edge of your seat waiting on that one.

Tank dump valves. The least popular compartment under the motorhome.

I was thinking about those three tanks while camping this past week and began to see an analogy (like all analogies... it is not perfect but, stay with me.) We start out life with that life-giving, crystal clear, suitable-for-drinking, fresh water. But, because we are human and imperfect, that clean water, which comes in contact with our life, turns gray. All the dead skin, soil, and grime that runs off of us as well as the soapy, decaying particles that go down the kitchen sink turns that clear water to gray. It stops looking like what we started with. You may say it is just soapy water but... that's understating the condition of the water. I think the gray water can be like the everyday mistakes and ways we are disobedient... no longer pure and no longer clean. Because it is like the water most people are producing, we don't consider it THAT bad. That's our take on it. But it isn't clean. You would never want to drink it. It's not the best water we have to offer. But we look at everyone else and say that it's not so bad. (Some campgrounds even let you drain your gray water directly to the ground in designated areas.) Then there is the black water. Sometimes, how we live our lives can be such that we produce something that is toxic. It can make things (and people) it comes in contact with sick. It stinks. Nobody wants to be around it. Throughout our lives, we are generating smelly, soiled gray water and even some really nasty, disgusting black water. Regardless of whether gray or black... both are bad water. And both have to be dealt with... it needs to go. Yes, my tanks can hold tens of gallons of gray and black water; but, why would I want to continuously carry that around with me?

God's intention for our lives is to live in the crystal clear, fresh water that He has provided. Our attitudes, our disobedience, and our behaviors (especially towards others) stinks up what God intends for us. But, there is good news.

Because of what God has done for us (because He knew we would disobey and soil and stink up what He provided) we are allowed to dump those tanks. Because of the saving work of Jesus, we get to eliminate all that gray and black water in our lives and let it go. As I live, I am going to continue to accumulate more gray and black water. Since God provides me the way to be rid of it, why would I want to hold on to all that nasty stuff when I have been given the opportunity to let it go? The ability to dump the tanks, leaving me with only that beautiful fresh water I started with. I need to dump my tanks. I need to start anew with a fresh start. Every day. I need forgiveness, I need mercy, I need grace. I need to allow God to take away all that nastiness that I produce. Dump your tanks.

Amazing Grace

Sin. You realize that this word really has only one definition, right? I mean, we can use it in our day-to-day conversation in ways that somehow muddy up its meaning. “Did you eat any of that chocolate dessert? It’s absolutely sinful!” [Cake isn't sinful.] “It’s just a sin that everyone wasn't able to get into that concert…it was that good!” [Inability to get into a concert isn't a sin.]

Here’s the thing about sin. None of us avoid it. All of us commit it. But here’s another thing… we seem to be more concerned [maybe even obsessed] with the sin of others than our own. [Jesus used the illustration of the speck in someone else’s eye versus the log in your own.] Do I have a log in my eye? Of course I do. But I like it better if I can rationalize that the speck is in my eye and the log is in yours.

Hey, Westboro Baptist Church- do you want to demonstrate in front of a place where sinners are? Then why aren't you carrying signs out in front of my house? I mean, there are only three of us here right now but... my house is occupied 100% by sinners.

By the way, have you seen the “Official Sin Grading Scale” that ranks sins from top to bottom…from least to first? I bet it’s an even better read than Letterman’s Top 10 List. I’m kidding…there really isn't an official sin grading scale. But there IS an unofficial list. We all have made one. The thing is…my most common sins are (fortunately) not in the top 10 on my list (I’m glad I’m using my grading scale otherwise….geesh I’d feel pretty filthy and unworthy.)

The trouble is that Sin # 8,341,890 on my list had the same effect on my relationship with God as Sin #1. It means that I am 100% disobedient. I know, I know…this doesn't quite seem fair...to us. Sin #1 is far more detestable (to me) than Sin #8,341,890. But I’m not the One that has been offended. I don’t get to set the standard. The One who created me does. Tell one lie and I am a liar. Lust one time and I am an adulterer (that’s right…adulterer.) Think one immoral thought and I’m a deviant. Withhold one thing from someone in need and I am a thief. And murderer? By Jesus’ standard, I am that too.

The good news? The REALLY, REALLY good news? God does not condemn me for my sins. Why? Because of the saving work of Jesus on the cross and my acceptance of His gift of grace, my sins yesterday, my sins today, and my sins tomorrow are forgiven. I have been pardoned. You might not forgive me for my sins and I certainly can understand that. I too struggle with the sin I see all around me. I want people to stop sinning. I especially want myself to stop sinning. I can definitely relate to Paul who wrote in his letter to the church at Rome: "I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do. But what I hate, I do." (Romans 7:15 NIV) But, I come back to this point…why am I so concerned with the sin around me and seemingly less concerned about the sin within my own heart? Maybe it makes me feel better about myself. Thankfully, God hasn't deputized me to be His law enforcer. If He did, my first action would have to be locking myself in jail... marking a swift end to my career in law enforcement.

58 years ago, when I was born unexpectedly early in a little town hospital in Maine weighing only 3 pounds; for some reason, God saved me from most certain death. The priest had been summoned to baptize and pray some last rites over me. But I was spared. 29 long years later I asked Jesus to take my life and He saved me all over again...but this time for eternity. And since then, sin separates me from Him no more.

Nobody ever wrote a song titled "Amazing Law."

It’s called Grace. Amazing Grace.

A King With Worms

I don't see any worms?

I know this is a strange blog title and you may be wondering if I am merely using it metaphorically. Nope. This is about a king... and worms.

You know... these days there aren't nearly as many kings lording over countries as there were back in the olden days. And, even in those countries that still have kings and queens, most times the country is actually run by a parliament, prime minister or other political apparatus.

England in the late 1400's was ruled by a king. King Richard III was the monarch of the British Empire for all of 2 years. He died in battle in 1485, seven years before Christopher Columbus sailed to the West Indies and founded the Sandals Resorts in the Caribbean.

A year ago, King Richard's remains were discovered... underneath the Grey Friars Church parking lot in Leicester, England. I know it's not really funny but...I keep thinking about that song that says "they paved Paradise...put up a parking lot."

Seems in 1935, they believed that they had discovered Richard when a leaden coffin and skeletal remains were discovered at the ruins of the Church of St. Mary in Leicester. Turns out...it wasn't Richard III....or any Richard for that matter.

The under-the-parking-lot remains found last year have been scientifically shown to be the real deal. The DNA from the remains match samples from modern day descendants and the skeleton shows signs of scoliosis (twisted spine) as well as eight battle wounds to the head...all consistent with what is known about him. But it seems old Richard had something else going on before he died.

He had worms.

Now, if your stomach didn't just now turn a bit...well, I'm not sure what to think.

The evidence from the remains most likely shows that Richard suffered from roundworms (roundworm eggs are quite hardy and resist decomposition and erosion.) Chances are the good king ingested roundworm eggs from food that was contaminated with...well.....poo. Roundworms (Ascaris lumbricoides) can live in the gut and its eggs follow your southbound highway back out to the light of day. Unfortunately, the light of day is where food is grown and handled and where most of our poor sanitary habits take place.

In 2013, we don't think of human beings as having these nasty, parasitic creatures living inside of us. We don't see them but we can certainly see the evidence of their existence. And then we can spread it around for others to possibly get. In fact, while roundworm is very uncommon in humans in the United States, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reports that 1.2 billion people worldwide suffer from roundworm. Yes, billion with a "b." The World Health Organization claims that roundworm claims 60,000 lives each year. Tragically, most are children.

In the 1400's, it didn't matter if you were a mere serf toiling in the fields, a prisoner chained to a wall in some prison, a wealthy landowner and noble...or even a king. You were not immune to the possibility of something inside of you that could kill you and that you could share with those around you because of your own and their poor habits. Richard's physical death was not caused by this thing inside of him which was eating him away. No, he was fortunate to die in battle. His predecessor, King Richard I may have had the heart of a Lion...but King Richard III had the gut of a hound.

Most likely, you and I don't have roundworm. But, as humans, we were born carrying around something more insidious inside of us that doesn't discriminate between young or old, rich or poor, man or woman. Even if we had not been born with it, we would have, because of our nature, freely ingested it at some point. And, because we have it, it affects the people around us. And, left untreated, it brings death.

Romans 3:23 says "for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God"
Romans 6:23 says "for the wages of sin is death but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord"

Scripture taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide.

Naked. And. Afraid.

Maybe you have watched the new survival themed television show, "Naked and Afraid." It is not dissimilar to some of the other survivor type reality shows. Well, it is different in one regard. The man and woman (strangers) are dropped into some survival setting with nearly nothing...each one gets to choose only one item. Oh, and get this...they are buck naked. Fortunately, the network blurs out the exposed parts that your Momma (and the network censors) always said you should keep covered up. Rear camera angles...not so much blurred. Some of the folks are married (although not to each other.) Both folks have an above average level of survival skill experience. They have to survive for 21 days on some remote island, jungle, desert...whatever...relying on their individual survival skills and each other. The first episode I watched (honestly I couldn't make it through the whole episode) was on immediately following the broadcast of Nick Wallenda walking across the Grand Canyon. So...my cable box was already tuned to that station.

By the end of the 21 days (not all have made it to the end) both of the survivors look quite different from when they began. They usually have lost significant weight and look quite disheveled to say the least. It's almost like they have been in a battle. Naked. And. Afraid.

In the 3rd Chapter of Genesis, we read the story of Adam and Eve's disobedience of God's command not to eat of the tree in the middle of the garden...the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.

"Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the Lord God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the Lord God from among the trees of the garden. But the Lord God called to the man, "Where are you?" He answered, "I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid." Gen 3:8-10 NIV

Prior to this, it seems that neither the man nor the woman ever thought twice about the fact they were without garments or coverings. Of course, the "nakedness" of our first parents really had very little to do with a lack of clothing. Their disobedience had been uncovered and they were now fully exposed. And they were afraid. They even tried to cover themselves (their sin) with garments of their own making. We see very early in Scripture that man and woman are unable to cover their sin by their own efforts. God steps in and covers their nakedness with garments of His making...the skins of animals. This required the shedding of blood as the animals were sacrificed in order to provide the covering.

A lot has happened in the world of garments since that time. We are quite proud of our coverings. We spend a lot of money for our coverings. Surely, our clothing provides protection from the elements but, our clothing is still primarily to cover up our nakedness.

Do you ever feel naked...and afraid? Do you ever feel like you have been stripped down and left with nothing? Maybe your life feels a bit like it is falling apart. You feel like you are so exposed. You feel vulnerable, uncertain, unprotected...and maybe all alone. And it feels like everyone's piercing eyes are trained on you with looks of judgement or pity or scorn. You feel naked...and afraid.

We all struggle. Life comes at us sometimes like the soothing warmth of a morning sunrise. Ah, those days are so good. And we rejoice. Other times it comes at us like a raging hailstorm, pelting us with stones of pain or failure or regret. Some days life is just so hard. Life can strip us of all the things in which we find comfort and peace and contentment. Sometimes we find ourselves naked. And that can be scary.

I'm no bible statistician but, I'm pretty sure one of the most repeated messages from God is something like this: Fear Not...Do NOT Be Afraid. God sees you. God knows your circumstance. And like the emergency responder who has plucked you from the icy waters, armed with a warm blanket wrapping it tightly around you with caring, strong hands...God wraps his mighty arms around you with His blanket of lovingkindness.

Sometimes, I'm like Adam wanting to hide from my Heavenly Father. I feel naked and I am afraid. But just like when God asked Adam, "Where are you?" ...He knows exactly where I am. And he knows exactly what I need.

I need Him.



Scripture taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide.

Which are you?

Where's the restroom?

The world is full of different types of people. We have male and female, young and old, wealthy and poor, married and single, people with children and people without... illustrating just a few of the distinctions....some of which allow for some middle ground. I have often thought about how people are different; how and why they observe, relate and react to things so differently. Of the few distinctions I've mentioned... do you think the greatest "difference" is between male and female? Certainly there are significant differences between the two. I used to think that was the greatest distinction...until we had children. Then my position changed and I leaned more towards the distinction between "people with children" and "people without children."

But I have abandoned the contrasts above as being the most distinct. I have a different theory. I think there are two types of people in the world and this distinction has a huge influence on how people view themselves, view others and how they respond to the world around them. Ready?

One type of person views mankind as basically good. The other views mankind as basically "bad" or, as described in the Bible, sinful. Now, I know some of you are going to react strongly to this. But bear with me..hear me out. Group # 1- Mankind is basically good. Group # 2- Mankind is sinful (or, for lack of a better word... not-good)

I know I am making some generalizations but, if you view people as basically good, your view of how and why people behave badly, do bad things, commit the most horrible of crimes, mistreat others, etc. is different than the "how and why" explanation that Group #2 has. Group # 1 may argue that humans have a basic "goodness" to them (or start out as basically good) and through circumstances, external influences, injustices of society, etc. ...some ...become "bad." Let me also say that "good" and "bad" as used in most conversations, are relative terms but, most people observe the world around us and can generally agree that certain people are seen as good while others are seen as bad or, at least, behaving badly.

What about Group #2? Isn't it a bit harsh to say that people/ mankind is basically "bad." It might be harsh but I'm not the one that first said this. The Bible tells us "for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." (Romans 3:23) [It has been argued for a long time whether the word "all" in this passage (pantes in Greek) is meant as every single human without exception or the more collective "all of us" or even something different still. I am not attempting to answer that argument here...it would encompass the remainder of this post and more. Bear in mind, I also lifted the Apostle Paul's words out of context]

Where did they learn selfishness?

Observing our and other people's very young children, I saw the nature that demonstrated selfishness and manipulation long before anyone could have taught or modeled that behavior to them. So, where did it come from? How did they learn these "bad" behaviors at such a very young age? Group # 2 might suggest that it is our basic nature to be selfish, and demonstrate the other "bad" behaviors that often results from this most basic not-so-good quality.

If you subscribe to Group # 1, then you probably believe that some people "become" bad primarily due to their circumstances or some thing/ many things unusual that happens to them. This often leaves parents/families and society feeling that they have somehow failed the person and have responsibility for the person's actions/ behaviors. Don't get me wrong, parents/families and society certainly can contribute to the resulting "bad"-ness. But if the bad behaviors of parents/ families or society are causal, where did their "bad"-ness originate?

So as not to make this any longer than it already is, here's my take. Man is born with a sinful nature...we are NOT basically good. Only through the guidance of others, the influence of God's Holy Spirit, and the redeeming work of Jesus Christ do we have any hope of "goodness." In reality, when compared to God, we are so far from good, the minor distinctions between each of us in that regard are minuscule. That's like you bragging that you can jump higher than me. But if the standard for jumping is to jump to the moon, your ability to jump a foot higher than me is irrelevant.  If the standard for goodness is Jesus Christ...well, we all need help. And the Good News is we have just that..the help and Hope of Jesus Christ. None of us are good. When we acknowledge that, it reveals things like racism and elitism for what they are...our simple-minded ideas that we are somehow "more good" than another. So, you can jump higher than me? Wow, aren't we impressed. I don't expect some of you to agree with me and would love to read your comments whether you agree/ disagree or just want to weigh in. Your comments, like a gift, are so appreciated